I was browsing through the oldjapanesecar.com forums, who (like many car forums) have an ebay/auction site thread which is a good place to find things that you might have missed in your own trawling or alternatively wouldn’t have seen anyway because it’s from a country of origin different to your own.  I choked on several measures of hilarity when I stumbled upon this brilliant share by Australian OJC user, davehoos.

Toyota Corolla HE70

Toyota Corolla HE70

Oh yeah baby, this could be more of an Australian Japanese car if it tried.  Those of keen eye and knowledge will see the “kit” traces back to the mighty Holden Torana SL/R 5000.  That’s not all that’s Aussie about it though, “What does the ‘H’ in HE70 stand for?” I hear you ask.  Well…

It stands for Holden, obviously not worthy enough of Holden’s 308, this has received the much lesser and often entirely disregarded 253.

253ci Holden V8, maaaaaaaate

253ci Holden V8, maaaaaaaate

Crikey! She fits like a glove!  Diggery do!  Throw another shrimp on the baaaarbie! etc.

Did you say, more?

Did you say, more?

Were that not enough to assault your senses, they also managed to slap on a bonnet scoop of ‘hornet’ replication and some freakishly disgusting oversized and ghastly wheels with oddly paired tyre combinations.   What, with the 253, the Torana ‘kit’, the wheels and the white racing stripe, you’d think you’d hit all the buttons of poor taste in one foul swoop, would you not?  Of course you would! Well, it gets better (at being worse)

Racing Mesh, its for when youre racing.

Racing Mesh, it's for when you're racing.

Chk owt mi ph4t fan instll

Chk owt mi ph4t fan instll

Ahh, magic.  A radiator fan mounted (or should I say dismounted) below the bumper line afront the apron.  Nice, this puppy is all class.  You can check it out or maybe throw on that starting bid of $3000.00 AUD, right here on eBay Australia;

http://cgi.ebay.com.au/TOYOTA-COROLLA-1983-V8-GONE-INSAINLY-MAD_W0QQitemZ250488265138

-Michael

3 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *